I can’t seem to grasp the sacredness of a blog that so many of my friends seem to indulge in.

Isn’t the point of a blog to let your thoughts run free and paint the webpage with words and pictures that best describe your feelings at the moment?

After spending 30 min writing out my thoughts about my past year, I ended up deleting the blog after I finished because no matter how many of those thoughts irate me, I couldn’t bear letting them be available to the general public to view. Yes, there’s privacy settings.. but I don’t blog enough to customize those. Therefore, I assume I just can’t grasp the purpose and sacredness of a blog since I’m unable to share my thoughts with just everyone. It feels too weird to know that my parts of my privacy will be exposed. In addition.. it’s just awkward to see someone you know in passing and know that they read your blog yet never touch upon the subject in person because neither of you wants to refer back to a stupid blog when in reality, you should’ve just known each other better in PERSON so that you didn’t learn about that person through the damn internet.

Eric started a blog for me and him to write in.. which I thought would be a cute experience. But when he started playing the “30 day challenge” game in which you reveal certain details about your life, I told him I didn’t want to write in the blog anymore. not that I really started much at all. I explained that I can’t have my privacy just hanging out there for anyone to read. If someone wants to know me, I want them to make the effort to get to know me in person, face-to-face, with no screen to hide behind. Plus, the internet doesn’t do friendships justice. He told me I was being silly and that I didn’t have to be so serious about what I wrote on Tumblr. I suppose that’s a good point, but it still makes me feel too uncomfortable to allow everyone to invade my thoughts when in reality, they don’t know me well at all.

Perhaps I’m not suited to fit the blogger personality the way I used to back in middle school.

Day 2 - A photo of yourself from a year ago

when life-sized Jacob first entered suite 1013B haha

Day 1 - Your facebook profile picture.

avianloves:

ambam:

Day 1 - Your facebook profile picture.
Day 2 - A photo of yourself from a year ago.
Day 3 - A photo that makes you happy.
Day 4 - A photo of the last place you went on holidays.
Day 5 - A photo of you without make-up
Day 6 - A photo that makes you laugh uncontrollably.
Day 7 - A photo of someone you love & miss.
Day 8 - A photo of your favorite band/musician.
Day 9 - A photo of your family.
Day 10 - A photo of you as a baby.
Day 11 - A photo of your favorite film(s).
Day 12 - A photo of you and a pet.
Day 13 - A photo of you and your best friend(s).
Day 14 - A photo of one of your favorite family members.
Day 15 - A photo of you and someone you love.
Day 16 - A photo of you at the last party you went to.
Day 17 - A drunk photo of you.
Day 18 - A photo of one of your favorite books.
Day 19 - A photo of you at school.
Day 20 - A photo of something you enjoy doing.
Day 21 - A photo of you driving.
Day 22 - A photo of your town.
Day 23 - A photo of you and a friend at work.
Day 24 - A photo of you that your hair looks nice in.
Day 25 - A photo of a night you loved.
Day 26 - A photo of a special trip in last 6 months.
Day 27 - A photo of last summer.
Day 28 - A photo of what you ate today.
Day 29 - A photo of someone you find attractive.
Day 30 - A photo of you when you were happy.

I CAN DO THIS!! :)

I just keep telling myself.. I have to really make it right in my head because there won’t be anyone else around to do it for me.

I have to make sure I keep this completely professional, no conflict of interest, and definitely to isolate my personal emotions from the situation =\ it’s not fair to anyone for me to act in any other manner.

It’s just hard to have to face this shit head on.. that is if it even escalates to that extent.

Life is so damn cruel.

Maybe if I stay busy enough this semester.. I’ll be worth something.

will power, self respect

goodbye.

this deserves to be on http://theyahooanswers.tumblr.com/

haha what the fail.

1 year since you sent me that text message.

1 year since you broke my heart.

1 year since I’ve last cried over a boy.

1 year since I’ve stopped believing and hoping.

Maybe things haven’t been the same since then.. but I’m better for it.

I bet you didn’t think I’d remember the date.

Went on a food rampage yesterday for lunch and dinner. I didn’t get to take a picture of my sushi but man I feel like I ate my weight in food yesterday.

This is just a picture of the best brownie I’ve had. It’s a 7 layer brownie from Twisted Fork - a local restaurant in Raleigh. The other brownie, gooey caramel, was mediocre compared to the 7 layer brownie. om nom nom nom nom.. now I want to go back for more!